I agree with your wife—Slim and Shorty are just quirky enough to entertain and make me curious about what’s to come, especially when I get to chapter 1, and it’s an entirely different cast of characters. I found it so satisfying when the duo show up again later (and the subtle hint at the loudmouths they follow is perfect).
Also, starting with this alternative beginning would not have hooked me as a reader. As you say, I wouldn’t have had any investment in Liz and the others to feel their perilous position. Who is the good guy? Who is the bad guy?
The jumping of POVs and shifts between story threads does a much better job at drawing me along into the story. In fact, I was surprised how the Flat Earth Interludes nestle into the plot so seamlessly. I truly thought it wasn’t part of the novel, but just random (though associated storyline) you used to draw out the serial for some reason. When it connected, I realized that I should’ve seen it coming, though I didn’t think it was part of the actual novel. That, obviously, won’t be the case for a “bound” copy, but I enjoyed the surprise here on Substack.
I agree with your wife—Slim and Shorty are just quirky enough to entertain and make me curious about what’s to come, especially when I get to chapter 1, and it’s an entirely different cast of characters. I found it so satisfying when the duo show up again later (and the subtle hint at the loudmouths they follow is perfect).
Also, starting with this alternative beginning would not have hooked me as a reader. As you say, I wouldn’t have had any investment in Liz and the others to feel their perilous position. Who is the good guy? Who is the bad guy?
The jumping of POVs and shifts between story threads does a much better job at drawing me along into the story. In fact, I was surprised how the Flat Earth Interludes nestle into the plot so seamlessly. I truly thought it wasn’t part of the novel, but just random (though associated storyline) you used to draw out the serial for some reason. When it connected, I realized that I should’ve seen it coming, though I didn’t think it was part of the actual novel. That, obviously, won’t be the case for a “bound” copy, but I enjoyed the surprise here on Substack.
Thanks for the feedback! It’s good to confirm that I’m on the right track.